I’m glad your school uses Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People to inculcate values and principles to the students. I only wished that they could delve into it a little deeper instead of just skimming the surface. This blog is not about the habits, you can read about it in this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Seven_Habits_of_Highly_Effective_People
The 7 Habits are : Be Proactive, Begin with the End in Mind, First Things First, Think Win/Win, Seek First to Understand, then Be Understood, Synergise, and Sharpening the Saw.
It was a great window of opportunity last Sunday evening, when I reprimanded your little brother, and you took the initiative to come to me and teach me how to be nicer to your little brother so that he can listen to me.
I used that chat we had to share with you what being proactive is about. You were proactive when you came to me to talk about your little bother’s disciplinary matter. That shows the internal motivation in you to want to engage in a conversation.
So I need to know where can we take it to? Was this a random conversation? I decided to probe further.
Begin with the End in Mind
You had a plan, and you probably visualized that the talk can help me treat your brother a little nicer and kinder. That was you intent in coming to me to talk, to see a change in my behavior, to treat you brother a little nicer.
First Things First
Your brother’s well being is your primary concern. Your first priority is to make sure that thing between him and his dad gets better. People comes first before things.
The internal habits
Well, these are not exactly Stephen Covey’s words, he terms the first 3 habits as ‘Independence’. I explained them to you as internal habits as these are the habits you espouse internally. Only when you can do these 3 well, then you can move to the external habits, how you socialise and wotk with people in your life and around you.
How can we not talk about quadrant 2? Your school, seems to stop at just the 7 habits, didn’t delve further into the quadrant, which is a shame because the quadrants are so important in acting on the 7 habits.
Quadrant 2 is a quadrant of Important/Not urgent. This quadrant is the planning quadrant, where you decide how things fall in place, and in line. By itself it is the most important Quadrant, sort this out, you sort you life you, you discover your life’s purpose. The other quadrants are Not Important/ Not Urgent. Not Important/ Urgent. And Important/Urgent.
Once you can fully embrace the value Quadrant 2 brings, the other quadrant will shrink, you will expand your circle of influence, relative to your circle of concern. You really need this quadrant to make sure things gets done, on time and at its own schedule.
A Million Us
There are a Million us, perhaps more. Because our brains and minds are always wandering, wanting to do this and that. The mind is a very good servant, but a poor master, simply because the linear concept of time is poorly understood, the mind understands timing, but because we exists in a physical world, ruled by the proverbial 24 hours, we can only do so much. And the mind, being fickle, will drop things that no longer has an interest in, and you will have a physical world full of things incomplete. You do not see through things if you leave your mind to its own devices. A Million things incomplete because a million of us are tearing at each other, clamoring for the 24 hours.
So with a sound understanding and using of Quadrant 2, you make the million yous fall in line, take their turn. The Ian Who Wants to Paint, will get a time and schedule to paint. The Ian Who Wants To Play With Wayne, will have a time allocated. The Ian Who Wants To Read? Please take a number!
As the common saying goes “There is a place for everything, and everything in its place!” This is the saying of Quadrant 2.